Tonart: Eb major
Intro 1
Bb
Gm
Bb
Gm
Bb
Gm
Bb
Eb
Gm
Verse 1
Gm
All the seats at the Sunday masses
Bb
Filled with the masses' massive
asses
Bb
Classes pass as fast as molasses
Eb
Bb
Ceremonial reading glasses
Gm
Read a little bit of Leviticus
Bb
All the kids are a little too little for this
Bb
Bb
All the parents nod in agreement
Eb
Bb
I think I can vaguely see what He meant
Gm
Eb
Gm
It's too early in the morning, glory
Bb
To read another allegory story
The father reads a little bit farther
Bb
Eb
Assuring the assured that they
Gm
need not bother
When God, in verse forty-five
Bb
Said Said that slaves are okay to buy
C
Bb
He meant that people all from the start
Eb
Each have 'slaves' within their
Bb
hearts
Gm
Things that we have sold or bought
Bb
That are forced to pick our
moral cotton
Bb
God calls us to set these free
Eb
Bb
Free our hearts from slavery
Gm
And then as God goes on to explain
Bb
The logistics of buying and
selling slaves
Eb
Bb
Uh, he, the bible's sorta like uh,
there's like, typos
Gm
In the back, I sit and I nod
Bb
To the beats that are bumping
from my iPod
Bb
My God they're starting to pray
Eb
Bb
Gm
And over the music I can hear them say
Dear God, dear Lord,
Bb
dear vague muscular man with a beard or a sword
Gm
Dear good all seeing being
Bb
My way or the highway Yahweh
Gm
Bb
Gm
The blue balled anti-masturbator
Bb
The great all-loving faggot faggot hater
I'd like to thank your holy might
Eb
Bb
For making me both rich and white
Gm
And though this is your day of rest
Bb
I come to you with one request
There's so much pain
Bb
beyond this steeple
Eb
Bb
Wars and drugs and homeless people
Gm
Sadness where there should be joy
Bb
Hate and rape and Soulja Boy
C
Bb
A world in darkness needs your light
Eb
So I'm sure your schedule's pretty tight
Gm
But my dog just had surgery
Bb
If you could fix that first?
Bb
Eb
Jeses
Bb
De borah
Verse 2
Messing's fingers
Gm
in a holy place
Bb
Hail Mary full of Grace
Bb
Eb
Bb
Gm
Obama could you pass
some hope to the Pope
Bb
I know a couple dudes
who wanna elope
See the church said nope
Gm
so the bros can't cope
Eb
The bros can grope but the
Bb
bros can't cope
Gm
They've been in love and
they've been addicted
Bb
Who said they shouldn't,
Benedict did
'Cause in the holy land of the Lord
He's the holy landlord
And dicks are evicted
'Cause you can be a Benedict
Gm
Bb
If you've been a dick
under Benedict
C
Bb
But you can't have Benedicts
Eb
Because there's only one pope
Bb
And only one dick
Gm
Bb
Gm
What, yeah, a dick on a pope is
Bb
Just like a soap on a rope
'Cause it's pointless,
Bb
unless in prison
Throw up your bibles,
Christ has risen
Hallelujah, now it's raining men
Gm
Bb
Because the gender ratio
C
is one to ten
Bb
Winos at the Eucharist station,
Eb
trans-gendered-substantiation
Bb
Gm
Jesus Je sus Jesus
wasn't the Messiah
Bb
Get back I'm a heretic and I'm on fire
Bb
It was Oedipus those holy nights
Eb
The holy motherfucking christ
Bb
Gm
I'm a blasphemah
Post-Katrina
Bb
Cruising the marina
On a crusade to cruise aids
Eb
And blast FEMA
You're too late,
Bb
we're fucked we don't need ya
Verse 3
Amen, in the name of the father,
son and holy ghost
Head, shoulders, knees and toes
Eb
Bb
Turn up your nose, strike that pose
Outro 1
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TunerE A D G B E
Akkorde & SongtexteBb Gm Eb C
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