Tonart: Ab major
Verse 1
Where do we go from here?
G
C
Well, I really like the Food Network,
G
and that's what we in the business call
a segue.
of the Food Network,
love the Food Network.
F
I think that's just it, right?
You have cable,
C
you watch the Food Network,
it's amazing.
G
I love the show Chopped.
That's my favorite show.
Yeah, I love that.
We got a few choppies in
the house.
G
Sounds like that's nice. Yeah. Oh,
wow. Yeah. What a show, right?
Best show.
I love it.
D
It's my favorite show on television.
If you've never seen it before, what it is, one hour cooking competition show where four chefs
have to cook an appetizer and entree and a dessert using a basket of weird ingredients
they've never seen before
and then they line them up in
front of the judges.
The judges taste the dishes,
they eliminate them one at a time,
they chop them until one of them
is left standing and they win.
Great show, love it, amazing.
C
Just a couple things though
One thing I don't like on the show,
and this happens on a lot of
Bm
reality shows,
G
they always try and create an underdog on the show,
don't like that, don't need it,
G
don't care about anyone
who's on the show.
It doesn't matter to me at all.
don't, it's a 44 minute show.
I'm watching because I'm bad at cooking
and they're good.
End of story. That's it.
I don't even need to know their names.
Chef 1, 2, 3,
4, put them in masks.
F#m
I don't care.
It's not why I'm watching,
but they will always do that.
They'll try and hook
Em
G
They'll try and get you to care
about one of the chefs on the show.
Have you noticed that?
They'll cook the appetizer.
They'll line them up in front
of the judges.
Judges have not even said anything yet.
One of them will already be crying.
They're like, what's going
on?
And of course,
the host has to ask them,
I can't help but notice that
you're crying.
G
You know, what's wrong?
And it's just the most insane
G
Am
Oh my God! I woke up this morning
G
and my dog Lucy had a limp
and we didn't even know
what it was
because she's never walked
like that before
and I'm just so glad that
my mom took today off of work
so that she could take her to the
vet
because if she didn't take her,
then I would have had to
and I would have missed this show
and this show is literally my dream
to be on this show.
I don't care about your dog, okay?
I do not care at all.
I just want to watch you combine candy
corn and salmon.
That's a tough combo.
How are you going to do that?
That's why I'm watching.
I don't care.
Like I guarantee you
that didn't happen.
Probably a lot of you went
for a nice dinner
before the show tonight.
I guarantee you this didn't happen,
you're looking at the menu,
the server comes up,
they're like, hey,
C
F
just before you decide on your entree,
G
we would just like to let you know,
our chef's mother died last week.
G
he's cooking under duress back there.
C
Your meal's coming with
It might be a little extra salty.
G
Tears. He's crying in the food.
We told him to stay home,
but he refused to do it.
We're so glad you came here.
He didn't go to the restaurant.
Across the street, across the street,
chef said, he's totally fine.
F#m
Said he's great,
G
C
said he's having a great day
enjoying the sunshine.
G
We're so glad you came here
Am
Em
G
to Underdogs.
It's crazy.
The other thing I don't like about Chopped
is that the prize on Chopped is 10 ,000.
And everyone on that show acts
like that is a lot of money.
Like, don't get me wrong.
It's not not a lot of money.
I would love to have 10 ,000 tomorrow,
but it's not a lot of money
in the way that they act like it is.
Because 90 % of the chefs on that show,
when asked the question,
what would you do with the 10 ,000?
90 % of the chefs on the show
will look in the camera
with a straight face and say this.
Open a restaurant? Where?
Where are you opening a restaurant
for 10 ,000?
That should be the show after Chot.
G
They just call it the 10 ,000 restaurant.
Like, well, we found this really nice
mobile home
in between 88 -mile house
and 100 -mile house.
That's Lucy out front.
Turned out the limp was nothing.
She's the sous chef.
And you got to cycle uphill both ways
to get here,
but we think it's worth it.
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