Tonart: A minor•
Verse 1
Fdim
G#dim
Am
I was born with a dick in my brain,
yeah, fucked in the head
My stepfather said that I
G#dim
sucked in the bed
Am
'Til one night he snuck in
and said
Fdim
"We're going out back,
G#dim
I want my dick sucked in the shed"
Am
Can't we just play with Teddy
Ruxpin instead?
"After I fuck you in the butt,
get some head
Bust a nut, get some rest"
G#dim
The next day, my mother said
Fdim
"I don't know what
G#dim
the fuck's up with this kid
Am
The bastard won't even eat
Fdim
nothing he's fed
Dm
He just hung himself in the bedroom,
Am
"Debbie,
Fdim
don't let that fucker get you up set
Go in there, stick a fuckin'
G#dim
cigarette to his neck
Am
I bet you he's fakin' it, I bet you
G#dim
I bet he probably just wants to see
Am
how upset you would get
I'll go handle this ,of course,
G#dim
unless you object"
Fdim
"Ah, go fuck his brains out,
G#dim
if any's left in his head"
Verse 2
Am
If you could count the skeletons
in my closet
Dm
Under my bed and up under my faucet
I've completely lost it
Fdim
G#dim
Is he nuts? No, he's insane
Verse 3
the skeletons in my closet
Dm
Under my bed and up under my faucet
Am
Then you would know I've
completely lost it
Fdim
G#dim
Is he nuts? No,
G#dim
"Did you get him?" Nah, fucker tried to bite my face off
Verse 4
Am
I just got fuckin' chased
G#dim
off with a chainsaw
Dm
Am
Then he took the chainsaw,
Fdim
bit the fuckin' blades off
Ate the blades,
G#dim
stuck a baseball in a slingshot
Am
Then he aimed at his own face,
let the thing pop
Took his eye out,
G#m
G#dim
picked it up and played ping pong
Am
Then he played ping pong
with his own ding-dong
Fdim
That motherfucker's got
G#dim
nuts like King Kong
Am
Then he set the lawn mower
out on the dang lawn
And he laid all up underneath
it with the thing on
Then he took his pants,
Fdim
he took every fuckin' thing off
Everything, except his tank
G#dim
top and his training bra
Am
Ain't he raw? Yeah maniac,
that's Shady, dog
Man, that motherfucker's gangsta,
Fdim
ain't he, dog?
Am
Shady, dog, what be going through that
G#dim
fuckin' brain of yours?
Fdim
Say no more, what the fuck you
G#dim
waitin' for? Sing along
Verse 5
Am
If you could count the skeletons
in my closet
Under my bed and up
Dm
Am
under my faucet
Then you would know I've
completely lost it
Fdim
G#dim
Is he nuts? No, he's insane
Verse 6
the skeletons in my closet
Dm
Under my bed and up under my faucet
Am
Then you would know I've
Fdim
G#dim
Am
Is he nuts? No, he's insane
Verse 7
Don't you know what felch means? (Yeah), well, then tell me
Am
Would you rather get felched or
do the felching?
Fuck him in the ass,
Dm
Fdim
suck the cum out while you're belching
Burp, belch,
G#dim
then go back for a second helping
Am
Can you dig what I'm sayin',
man? Can you smell me?
Dm
I want you to feel me like
G#m
my stepfather felt me
Am
Fuck a little puppy,
G#dim
kick the puppy while he's yelping
Fdim
"Shady, what the fuck you saying?"
G#dim
I don't know, help me
Am
What the fuck's happening? I think
Am
"Marshall, I just love you, boy,
I care about your well-being"
No, No, Dad, I said no,
Dm
Fdim
I don't need no help peeing
I'm a big boy,
G#dim
I can do it by myself, see
Am
I only get naked when
the babysitter tells me
G#m
She showed me a movie like
G#m
"Nightmare on Elm Street"
Am
But it was X, and they called it "Pubic
Fdim
Hair on Chelsea"
"Well, this is called ass rape,
G#dim
and we're shooting the jail scene"
Verse 8
Am
If you could count the skeletons
in my closet
Under my bed and up
Dm
Am
under my faucet
Then you would know
I've completely lost it
Fdim
G#dim
Is he nuts? No,
Verse 9
Am
If you could count the skeletons in my closet
Dm
Under my bed and up under my faucet
I've completely lost it
Fdim
G#dim
Am
Is he nuts? No, he's insane
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