Tonart: F major
Verse 1
C
G
C
Phew! There's something
Oh! It's you
Come here and sit down
You're gonna have the truth told
G
C
about you and put on record
G
C
'Ere please don't sit too close to me,
I'm just having my breakfast
G
C
Thank you
Verse 2
C
Am
A
D
G
Who put salt in the sugar bowl?
C
Am
D
G
Who put fireworks in the coal?
C
F
C
Who put a real live toad in the hole?
D
C
My brother
Am
Dm
G
Who put jam in mother's shoe?
C
Am
D
G
Who made real caterpillars stew?
C
F
C
Who locked grandad in the loo?
My brother
Verse 3
F
E
Em
Am
My brother said it wasn't he
Dm
G
C
Who put shampoo in grandma's tea?
F
C
G
A
My brother said that it was me
D
C
G
My brother's rotten
C
Am
D
G
Who squeezed toothpaste round the hall?
C
Am
D
G
Who put soot in the baby's butts?
C
F
Who drew things on the garden wall?
Am
C
My brother
Verse 4
C
You ought to see what he drew
Ah, what a surprise
Nobody knew what it was really
G
C
But everybody had a
"Down with young mothers"
that was one
G
'Cause he don't think our mum
C
knows how to bring us up right
G
C
I don't think so either
You know every night when we're wide awake,
she makes us go to bed
And in the morning when we're fast asleep,
G
C
she makes us get up
Verse 5
C
Dm
G
Whose pet mouse made auntie shriek?
C
Am
D
G
Who ate glue and couldn't speak?
C
F
C
What clever dick was sick for a week?
C
Am
Dm
G
Who keeps maggots in a tin?
C
Am
D
Plays the twist on his violin
G
C
F
G
Who's been gettin' at the gin?
Verse 6
Fm
C
Am
a chimney sweep
Dm
G
C
But dirt they say is just skin deep
Em
A
D
he's asleep!
C
But you don't know what he's
F
C
G
C
dreamin' about (do ya)
Am
Who wouldn't mind if I
Verse 7
Dm
G
ride his bike?
C
Am
D
G
Who lets me shot his gun if I like?
C
F
Who says I'm best at football,
Fm
C
ludo, snakes and ladders?
Hide- and- seek,
F
Db
chasin' each other up and down the garden
C
Pinchin' little girls up the
Well, he's gotta say I'm best
C
F
'Cause I'm bigger than he is and if he don't say I'm best at everything,
C
F
C
I'll bash him, haha
G
C
My lovely, lovely brother
Verse 8
let's get out of here
Before you fall down the
Come on give us your
G
C
hand' we're gonna wal—
'Ere what you had in your hand
'Ave ya
Woo!
G
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