Tonart: A major•
Verse 1
it's anti -records recording artist
Nico
Case.
Hey
Meatwad.
Yeah, hey.
What you doing in my house, girl?
Well, you invited me.
We're friends,
Meatwad, remember?
Oh, yeah, right.
Yeah, I know.
You ain't no cop, are you?
Because you're supposed to say if you is.
No, I'm not a cop.
Oh, good.
Nico, I'm glad you're here.
Let's you and me sing a song
about the best
Christmas gift of all.
The wonder comes from deeper than,
from the nose region, specifically.
D
A
Santa left a booger in my stocking.
F#m
Bm
Christmas cheer.
Saint
D
E
A
Nick swiped and wiped and left
F#m
me something ripe.
D
E
A
I knew I'd been a good boy this year.
Meet what someone left a
D
A
booger in your stocking.
But I don't think that they
D
F#m
meant it as a gift
Bm
D
E
I really think the issue was they
A
F#m
couldn't find the tis sue
D
And they used your stocking
E
A
as a handkerchief
No, it was
D
Santa who left a booger in my
And he made sure it was
D
F#m
Bm
Christmas bright and green
D
E
He took his mitten off and shoved his
A
F#m
finger up the booger trough
D
E
And brought a gift down his
Meatwad,
D
you leave boogers everywhere
F#m
Bm
Under tabletops and chairs
You left
D
Three boogers and earwax
You strung boogers round the tree
F#m
With bullets on boogers underneath
Bm
An d on the back door, by the porch
E
D
C#m
E
Bm
You left a boogery
E
A
Wait, are you saying I might have left
D
A
a booger in my own stocking?
Well, negro kids,
D
F#m
Bm
they just don't make no sense.
D
Every time I pick a winner,
E
A
E
F#m
I make that winner dinner.
D
E
A
And I digest all the evidence.
D
A
No, it was
Santa
D
A
Claus left a booger in my stocking.
Stop.
It's not
Santa's booger meat,
Wad.
What?
I'm sorry, buddy.
It's not
Santa's booger.
Well, shoot,
I know that.
You do?
Yeah.
Santa don't make his own boogers.
He's an elf booger.
See, in his workshop up in the
North
Pole,
they grow boogers in the elf nurses.
Santa just picks them and distributes.
He's a middle man.
I just didn't want to complicate
things for the listener.
I know how the operation works,
so we good.
You do the song the way I
Well, I wrote it.
E
OK,
A
D
A
Santa left a booger in your stocking.
D
I'm glad that we can finally
F#m
Bm
agree.
D
E
He shoved his finger in his nose
A
F#m
and put out a nugget of gold
D
E
A
for me to complete my snot nativity.
D
E
Santa must have had a cold,
A
F#m
because he blew out 24 keg
D
Don't hold me to complete my
E
A
D
A
snot nativity
Alright, so you want you some eggnog,
Nico?
Is that nutmeg?
Uh, no, it's milk.
Boogies.
Thank you, no.
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