His hooves in dirt pound
And eat up ground
He cannot remain bound
When the trumpets sound
Let's review some recent facts
I make decent cash, I'm a minor star
And we can't last if she
don't drive a hybrid car
I scribble vapid raps
on your flyer backs
The word is I purchased
a refurbished Mac G4
Pull up to critical mass in
a gas- guzzling Ford
Just to ask you when next your
rock outfit performs
Before you tell me the fact,
I'm down the road yelling back
Please post it on the Whole
Foods bulletin board
I'd earn a lick of respect
in slum art for sure
But I threw out my lumbar
picking up checks
I'm so numb, Lord, yes,
despite how I'm blessed
I'm destined to end up
a slum lord depressed
Come by, poorly dressed,
your address on the first
Hum something under my breath that
half resembles some words
And like a bird in a suit
cut for a brutish bear
Back out of there bowing
like a Jew in prayer
I'll never shirk this first world curse
A steady hurt and a sturdy
purse
A small dark bard,
I'll give an inch to start
Then leave you home dreaming
of the whole nine yards
Leave you home dreaming,
believing that you'd seen me
Loose skin breathing like a cathed
ral at evening
Screaming like a demon in
the Garden of Eden
Missing what parts that a
stork in its beak brings
But even what an evil man
thinks is really pink
And on his insides,
doesn't mean you shouldn't pull his card out
So what if a man blinks in Morse code while he
sings if he sings his heart out?
Everybody's gotta get paid
I'd say "far out, no way"
Frankly, I'd be amazed
But a patriot would save the day
Make the hitch, help C.I.A
What's bad, what's good
A complicated man is misunderstood,
even to himself
Acutely unaware what's in
a shallow breath of air
And long exhale of something else
Two sips, instant drip, Sanka mud
New corpus publicist, thanks ya bud
As hundred bucks worth
of wordy blogger thugs
Come forth forthwith to
four seasons aflood
To morbidly orbit your toilet like
hornets abuzz
Forming above like buzzards in love
When you first wake up,
spitting sick from the gut
And shitting black blood at six
Then you wonder why I'm high up,
sitting, yup
The blundering braggart
From a covered wagon spitting
under the vagrants in gutters
What, does it make me evil?
Am I a feeble deranged fuck?
Cause Jesus would and I would not
drive the needle exchange truck?
Well if I'm out of luck,
I'm still pitching notes through this throat
Pissing fears and hopes through
the ears of folks listening
No matter what,
batter up enough of this nonsense
You can gather up the contents of the
catcher's cup and suck
You kneel and squint your eyes and cup
your hands against the window
Just to see who rides,
to get a glimpse inside the limo
Have some self- respect and
exercise some tact
While I supply the info that you lack
One must pay the frat fee to enjoy
the fat- free snacks
Strippers, roofies, and six- packs,
and groupies with big breasts
Sending out mass texts asking who's next
To get his lance waxed in
the wickedest sex acts
Step back from the stretch,
mack, and mind the gap
With all due respect sir,
there's a limited cap
You'll need a ticket to kick it in the back
Of this rented, tinted- out black Cadillac
But I can tell by your polo slacks,
Sebagos, and blank stare
You're good for the total package
and game to be back there
But who am I to judge a man's
heart by his yacht wear?
And it scares me to death, yes,
that I'm starting to not care
Good and evil's often
neither strength or flaw
But sod in the seed of what you are
A filthy silt stashed in a white silk sash
Or a doula dove smashed
in an airplane crash
You'll never shirk this
first world curse
A steady hurt and a sturdy purse
A steady hurt and a sturdy purse