Tonart: F major
Verse 1
D
A
G
D
G
D
A
D
The highways that wind
G
and wander across this lonesome land
D
sure can get weary sometimes.
Especially when you get a flat
on the old easel.
G
I was barreling down Old 77 one day,
D
and I just passed a hobo
G
who'd given me the thumb.
A
And I gave him the thumb back
A
And wouldn't you know it,
D
G
about a quarter of a mile further,
D
I pulled up on the shoulder
A
with a flat on the right rear.
G
And as I stood there looking at it,
G
uttering some profane syllables,
D
G
The hobo walked up and said to me,
It ain't too bad,
D
it's only flat on the bottom.
G
Oh, brother, you could tell this guy
A
had been out of circulation
Whatcha gonna do about it?
A
Well, I was just gonna look for a man
Good, I'll help you look for him.
How about you?
Well, I mean,
D
how about you giving me a hand?
G
Oh, I'd like to help you, buddy,
D
but I'm too light for heavy work
and too heavy for light work.
D
Well, that might fit in there someplace.
Well, thanks a lot.
I'll fix it myself.
A
And I'll supervise the job.
Uh, say, old buddy,
G
how about giving me a dime
for a piece of cake?
D
Well, if that don't beat all.
G
D
And it's cake you want.
Well, today's my birthday.
A
All right, help me fix this flat
D
A
and I'll buy you a full dinner.
G
D
but, uh, let me see the menu first.
Bb
D
Look, Buster,
you know hard work won't kill you.
I don't know,
I lost several wives that way.
Come on now,
G
you look strong enough to work.
D
And you look handsome enough
D
but I see you're pushing this old easel.
G
D
Ah, surely you must have done some work.
Oh yeah, I work now and then.
What do you do? This and that.
Whereabouts?
Now when are you going to give
me that dime?
You can kid me if you want to,
D
but I'll tell you one thing.
G
I wouldn't change places
D
with a guy that had a million bucks.
A
How about five million?
How about ten million?
Not even, well, nah, that's different.
G
You're talking real dough.
D
Now looky here, you no good mangy, knock -kneed,
A
bow -legged, ball -headed, two -bit, hobo.
D
Who are you calling bow -legged?
Now look,
you're gonna help me fix this flat,
G
or I'm gonna break your...
Careful, chum, you'll bend the suit.
Now for the last time,
are you or ain't you?
D
Let me take a look at that tire.
A
Hmm, just as I thought.
That ain't no blowout, just a slow leak.
G
Hand me that tire pump.
And friends, if I hadn't seen
G
I wouldn't have believed it.
D
That tramp took that pump,
A
D
and with one hand, mind you,
G
pumped that big tire full of air in no time.
Well, what do you know? No flat.
D
Partner, I want to thank you.
Hop in the cab,
and the next stop we make,
I'll buy you the biggest steak
G
and the best cake they've
got in the house.
D
G
Sounds like a winner.
Just one thing, though.
D
I noticed you only used one hand
on that tire pump.
How come?
A
D
Oh, I don't know,
except this arm's broke.
Broke? Just a little bit.
A
Oh, I'm sorry, old buddy.
G
How did it happen? Well, it was like this.
I got a hold of this copy
D
of the Playboy magazine.
Yeah.
G
And I thought it was a Sears
and Roebuck catalog.
Go on.
A
filling out order blanks.
Oh, no.
D
Come on. Let's hit the road.
Outro 1
D
G
D
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