Tonart: Db major•
Verse 1
Gb
Ab
ant number one
Gb
Db
Gb
Ab
He's a skitsofrantic, serial killer clown
Gb
Db
Gb
Ab
Who says, "woman love his sexy smile"
Gb
Db
Let's find out if his charm
Gb
Ab
will work on Sharon
Sharon,
Gb
Db
what's your question?"
Verse 2
Gb
"Contestant number one,
Ab
Db
I believe first impressions last forever
Ab
So let's say you were to come over
Gb
Db
to my parent's house
And have dinner with me and my family
Ab
Db
Tell me what you would do to make
That first impression really
Ab
Gb
Db
stick"
Verse 3
Gb
Let's see, uh, well,
Ab
Db
I'd have to think about it
Ab
Gb
I might show up in a tux, HA!, but I doubt it
Db
I'd probably just show up na
Gb
Ab
Db
ked like I always do
Ab
And look your momma in the eye and tell her,
Gb
Db
"FUCK YOU!!!"
Hurry up bitch, I'm hungry,
Ab
Db
I smell spaghetti
I'd pinch her loopy ass and tell
Gb
her, "Get the food ready!"
Db
Gb
Your dad will probably start trip
Ab
Db
ping and get me pissed
I'd have to walk up and bust
Ab
Gb
him in his fucking lips!
Ab
Db
we hearing grace from your mother
I pull a forty out and pour some
Gb
for your little brother
Db
Gb
I'm steady staring at your sister,
Ab
Db
I'll tell you this
You know for only 13, she
Ab
Gb
Db
got some big tits
Gb
Db
After that, your dad will try to jump again
And only this time,
Ab
Gb
I'd put the forty to his chin
Db
Gb
After you mom does the dishes
Ab
Db
and the silverware
Ab
I'd dry-fuck her her till I nut in
Verse 4
Db
"Now, let's me contestant
Db
He's a psychopathic,
Ab
Db
de ranged, crackhead freak
Who works for the Dark Carnival
He says women call him stretch nuts
Sharon, let's hear your question"
Verse 5
Db
Ab
"I like a man who's not afraid
Db
to show his true emotions
Ab
A man who expresses himself
Gb
Db
in his own special way
Number two, if you fell in love with me
Exactly how would you let
Ab
Gb
me know?"
Verse 6
Db
Gb
Ab
Db
First thing, I could never love you
You sound like a richie-bitch,
Db
Gb
But if I did, I'd probably
Db
show you that I care
By taking all these other
Gb
motherfuckers outta here
Db
I'd go through your phone
Gb
Ab
Db
book and whack em all
And find contestant number one and break
Gb
Db
his fucking jaw (what?!)
Gb
Anyone who looked at you,
Gb
I'd be blowing fucking nuggets off all day
Db
I'd grab your titties and stretch
Ab
Db
em down past your waist
Let em go, and watch em both
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Gb
spring up in your face
Db
Gb
Ab
I'd sing love songs to you,
Ab
Gb
Get you naked, and hit it like a CAVEMAN!!!
Db
Gb
When we go to the beach and
Db
walk through the sand
I throw a little in your face and say,
Gb
Db
I'm just playing
Gb
Ab
Db
As you spit it all out, I'd rub your back
And grab your underwear and wedge
Ab
Gb
it up your ass crack!!
Interlude 2
Gb
Db
Db
"Well it sounds like
Verse 7
Db
contestant number two
Is just over-flowing with with sensitivity,
Sharon
It's a touch choice so far
Sharon, let's have your last question and
See which one is going to win
Gb
Db
the rights to your neden"
Verse 8
Db
Ab
Db
"Okay, if we were at a dance club,
and you both noticed me at the
Ab
Gb
Same time. Tell me,
Db
how would you each get my attention, and what would
Your pick up line be? Well,
Ab
Gb
whoever's the smoothest wins!"
Verse 9
Db
Gb
Db
Okay, first I'd slide up to the bar
And tell you that I can't believe
Ab
Gb
how fucking fat you are
Db
Gb
I'd tell that I like the way you
Ab
Db
make your titties shake
And if you lost a little weight,
Gb
you'd look like Rickie Lake!
Verse 10
Db
Gb
Ab
Db
Fuck that, you'd be jocking me quick
I'd order you a drink
Ab
Gb
and stir it with my dick
Db
Gb
And then to get your attention
Ab
Db
in the crowded place
I'd simply walk up and stick
Ab
Gb
my nuts in your face
Verse 11
Db
Yeah, freak with your nuts,
Ab
Db
yo, that'll get her
Verse 12
Tell her that's she fat, yeah,
Ab
Gb
that'll work even better
Verse 13
Db
Gb
Ab
Db
Look, fuck you, I got a strong rap
Shit, you don't want
contestant number two
Verse 14
Db
Gb
Ab
Db
I I walk into a bar and there he was
Standing up by a bucket,
Gb
eww, trying to fuck it
Db
It was a big fucking smelly,
Ab
Db
ass farm llama
Verse 15
Db
Damn dawg! how you gonna
Outro 1
diss your momma?!
Db
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