Tonart: E major
Verse 1
A
E
G#
This is a song for Phil Daoust:
A
Occasional Guardian Newspaper
C
D
D#dim
journal- oust.
E
G#
I never ever ever men tioned your name,
A
Or the review that you wrote,
B
when I was new to this game.
Verse 2
C#m
G#
But now the time has come,
B
Bbdim
F#
I think I've dealt with my feelings at last.
F#m
I really wanna forgive ya Phil,
B
F#
Yeah I wanna put the past in the past- a
Verse 3
E
G#
this is London Town,
A
C
I thought I outta take the opportunity.
D
B
E
'Cause there's a pretty good chance
G#
somebody out there will know you,
A
B
Maybe he will pass on a message for me.
Verse 4
C#m
C
Just wanna say, Phil Daoust, occasional
B
Bbdim
Guardian Newspaper journal- oust,
F#m
That it's been three years since you wrote it,
G#m
and time is very healing.
A
But I still wanna cut big chunks of flesh out of your stupid face and
B
Bsus4
B
make your children watch while I force you to eat them.
Bsus4
B
Yeah I wanna make your children watch
E
you eat your own face- meat.
Verse 5
B
Ding Dang Ding Dang Dong,
C#m
G#m
This is my Phil Doust Song,
A
E
Everybody sing along,
F#m
La la la la la la la,
B
E
I hope one of your family' members dies.
C#m
G#m
I've written you this spe cial song,
A
E
To help you get the at tention -
F#m
Bsus4
E
You obviously, desperately lack.
Verse 6
E
G#
And I know that you're a smart man,
A
And with such a fine mind,
C
B
I guess it has to be hard-
E
To resist throwing narcissistic,
G#
A
B
intellectual tantrums in the supermarket isles of your self- regard.
Verse 7
C#m
G#
C
B
Just wanna say, Phil Daoust, I know it must
E
Bbdim
be really hard to be a journal- oust.
F#m
While a deadlines always looming,
G#m
and the pressure to be entertaining.
A
So maybe you should quit and get a job that you'd be
B
better at - like killing yourself, you fucking cunt.
B
Verse 8
E
B
Ding Dang Ding Dang Dong,
C#m
G#m
This is my Phil Doust Song,
A
E
Everybody sing along,
F#m
Tra la la la la la la,
B
E
I hope something you love catches on fire.
C#m
G#m
I've written you this special song,
A
E
To show how far I've come along -
F#m
Bsus4
In my efforts to be more mature in the
B
C
Am
face of negative feedback.
You fucking poo- face.
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