Tonart: C major•
Verse 1
Am
Folks, with all the political correct
Am
and the environmental tree -huggers
that have us under their thumb,
I've written a poem to show
C
you what Christmas poems will be like
Am
in the next ten years.
Enjoy. This is "'Twas a Green Christmas,"
G
Am
a good sketch.
All right, kids, it's story time,
and tonight I thought I'd read
the New Earth -Friendly Version
of "'Twas the Night Before Christmas."
C
Am
Is everybody ready? Okay.
C
Read it out loud, you jerk!
Oh, sorry.
Am
C
"'Twas the night before
Am
the Greenstone Christmas
C
when all through the dome home
only compact fluorescent light bulbs were burning,
F
C
emitting less than one ohm.
The stockings was hung
by the clean burning chimney with care
F
in hopes that a non -discretionary
religious figure
C
who distributes gifts on said holiday would
The children were nestled
C
in their eco -friendly beds
C
-managed forests
Am
F
and paint with no lead,
Fm
F
and my inner hemp kerchief
and I and my soy cap
C
had just settled our brains
for a long winter's nap.
F
When out on the phosphorus -free
fertilized lawn
there arose such a clatter,
C
Am
I sprang from my bed to see what was
G
Away to the energy -efficient window
I flew like a flash,
tore open the vinyl cost
C
-cutting shutters
which save lots of cash.
The moon on the breast
Am
of the global warm snow
G
gave the luster of midday
C
When what to my wondering eye
should appear
but a hybrid sleigh powered
by eight tiny reindeer.
F
C
With a little old driver so lively and quick,
Am
I knew in a moment it
G
More rapid than a melting ice cap,
his courses they came
C
and he whistled and shouted
and called them by name.
Organic! Recycle!
On yoga! On herbal! On
Let's see you try rhyming biodegradable.
F
To the top of the porch, to the top of the wall,
now dash away, dash away,
Am
G
And then in a twinkling
C
I heard on my solar paneled roof,
the prancing and pawning of
each little hoof.
F
C
As I drew in my head
G
and was turning around,
down the chimney St.
Kringle came with a bound.
C
He was dressed in faux fur
from his head to his foot,
F
and his earth natural fibers
were all tarnished with soot.
Fm
Am
A bundle of non -toxic toys
C
he had flung on his back,
and he looked like a peddler
Am
F
just opening his sack.
His eyes how they twinkled,
his dimples how merry,
his cheeks were like roses,
Am
G
his nose like pesticide -free cherries.
was drawn up like a bow,
Am
and the beard of his chin
was as white
but went straight to his work,
Am
and filled all the stockings,
then turned with a jerk,
and laying his finger aside of his nose,
and giving a nod,
C
up the chimney he rose.
F
He sprang to his hybrid,
C
Am
to his team gave a whistle,
G
like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim
Am
as he drove out of sight,
G
Green Christmas to all,
C
F
and to all a good night.
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