Tonart: Gb major•
Verse 1
F#
What the hell is this, Rush?
We was out eatin' Christmas dinner,
and I'll tell you what, I'd hate to be
a waitress.
G#m
Or a wager.
G#
Good Lord, waitin' tables
gotta be the worst job in the world.
F#
You always hear folks say,
G#
A#m
it's better than waitin' tables.
F#
G#
Hey, what do you do for a living?
C#
B
Oh, I swim in a lake of turds
lookin' for lost change.
A#m
F#
Man, that must suck.
G#m
Well, it does, but it beats waitin' tables.
Well, I used to wait tables,
but it sucks so bad now
I got a job for the government
F#
jumping on landmines
G#
and have them explode underneath me,
ripping my guts out.
F#
But, hey, at least I ain't got to fetch
some jackass coffee.
B
F#
Tell you what, folks,
B
G#
I ain't never waited no tables a day in my life, but good Lord. If it's that bad,
then we ought to get rid of the death penalty
C#
F#
and sentence folks to five years of table waiting
G#
F#
down there at the Waffle House.
B
F#
I'd love to see that day of sentencing.
G#
Mr. Anderson, you've been convicted
C#
to 32 counts of murder and
I hereby sentence you
to the night shift
at the Denny's down
F#
there on the corner.
Lawyer stands up.
G#
Your Honor, this is inhumane.
Surely you could find it in your heart
G#
or fire and squat him.
Judge says, overruled.
Bailiff, give that sumbitch
an apron and a time card
D#
F#
and get him away from me.
A#m
Tell you what, what a drag waiting
G#
Like a waiter once said
F#
looking at the one ads quote
G#
hey give me the phone he's hiring boil suck
ers down there at the hospital unquote.
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